The Fanfic of Grey Bard

Fandoms. You name it, I've probably read or written in it. I like my fiction with a twist; just a little off the beaten track.

Oh, and if I say Evil Fic? I mean it. In other words: my story is technically possible in canon, but I'm using it to seriously frell up your mind. Why? Because it's fun, and you'll probably enjoy it. Don't go telling me that's not the way it is, because, well, that's the point.

Available for archiving to anyone who asks me nicely.

Disclaimer: All the characters are owned by the various Powers That Be. These are original stories that do not intend to infringe on their copyright.

More of Grey Bard's work can be found at AO3.

Write to Grey Bard at fitzrose at email.msn.com.

Fandoms

Abhorsen     Andromeda     Babylon 5     Battlestar Galactica 2003     Deadzone     Fables     Firefly     From Eroica With Love     Hellblazer     Hustle     Leverage     Lord of the Rings     Nero Wolfe     NCIS     Ocean's 11     Outsiders     Runaways     Sandbaggers     Sleepy Hollow     Stargate Atlantis     Star Wars     The Vorkosigan books     X-Files     Original Works    

Older Fics
Batman     Brimstone     Buffy     Daria     Farscape     The Sentinel     X-Men    

 

Abhorsen

Seven Bells
Fandom: Garth Nix - Abhorsen series
Written for: coffeebased in the Yuletide 2008 Challenge (here)
The description of the seven necromantic bells are taken directly from Garth Nix's book Sabriel.

 

Andromeda

High Maintenance
Summary: Harper is a very dedicated engineer. Really, he is.
Warning: *evil fic*
Rating: R

 

Babylon 5

Oh, Brave New World
Written for the Multiverse 2005 ficathon.
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Ivanova/Starbuck
Susan Ivanova and Kara Thrace are heading up the first terraforming mission the fleet has ever attempted, just in case the search for Earth doesn't turn out. After all, someone has to stop running.

Unto the Breach
Recipient: Medley
Rating: PG-13
Fandoms: Stargate: Atlantis & Babylon 5
Summary: Agent Bester is from the NID, and he's here to help you. Of course he is.

 

Battlestar Galactica 2003

Oh, Brave New World
Written for the Multiverse 2005 ficathon.
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Ivanova/Starbuck
Susan Ivanova and Kara Thrace are heading up the first terraforming mission the fleet has ever attempted, just in case the search for Earth doesn't turn out. After all, someone has to stop running.

 

Batman

Once
Summary: Oracle remembers how she learned that some questions don't have good answers.
Rating: PG-13

2am Blackbird
Summary: Cassandra Cain, the young Batgirl, finds that people don't always get what they deserve.
Rating: Pg-13 for unrequited f/f slash

There's Rosemary, That's For Remembrance
Summary: Terry discovers some unexpected files.
Warning: Evil Fic
Rating: PG-13 (implied... things )
Note: Beyondverse? Elseworlds? Maybe.
Written for Dark Lady's villain-fic challenge

Broken Mirror
Summary: Various... reflections... from the past. Set in the Batman Beyond universe. Make of it what you will.
Rating: PG

Scorched Earth
Summary: A nasty vindictive story from the point of view of a character in a nasty vindictive little mood. Take it as you will. Try it, it's a lot of fun in an odd way.
Rating: PG-13 (sheer nastiness and implied... things)

Atlas: Fathers and Sons I
Summary: A bittersweet musing from a neglected point of view in the Batman Beyond universe.
Rating: PG

Pygmalion: Fathers and Sons II
Summary: My own take on one of the most written about reunions in Batman fic. Give it a try, you might like it. The center of Fathers and Sons, my Father's Day trilogy.
Rating: PG

Prometheus: Fathers and Sons III
Summary: A view from the hill and the words that lie between friends. Sad in a gentle sort of way. The end piece to Fathers and Sons, my Father's Day trilogy.
Rating: PG

 

Brimstone

Touched By a What!
by Grey Bard
Email: fitzrose at email.msn.com
Category(s): Humor, Touched By An Angel Crossover
Disclaimer & Explanation: I do not claim to own or attempt to make money on either of these two fine shows. To you TBAA fans, I am sorry if I've shamelessly parodied, but it's so much fun!

End and Means
by Grey Bard
Email: fitzrose at email.msn.com
Category(s): Drama
Archive?: Yes please!
Disclaimer & Explanation: I don't own Fox or WB. What a pity. Thus I also don't own Brimstone. Too bad. And so I am on dangerous legal ground. I might be a criminal, even though I make no money on this. Big deal. I have nothing for TPTB to take that they would want anyway.
Okay, this is about what the end might be like, and you can guess who the narrator is.

 

Buffy: The Vampire Slayer

Moonlight
Summary: Angel returns, but all is not well.
Warning: *Evil Fic*
Rating: PG

 

Daria

The Great Pretenders
Summary: When Jane is in danger, Daria will go to extremes to save her.
Warning: Evil Fic
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: I don't own Daria. I don't make money off of her. If I did, she'd be pretty mad at me.

 

Deadzone

The Only Help You'll Get (You're Gonna Get Right Here)
Written for: Suaine for the "Slash the Slashers" challenge.
PG-13, femslash
Pairing: Teyla/Suaine
Fandoms: SGA, Dead Zone, and cameos.

 

Fables

Other Jungles
Written for: Wildcard in the Yuletide 2007 Challenge
by Grey Bard
"Many thanks to my world class beta readers Kadorienne and Juliette Torres, three cheers to my canon consultants Seanan McGuire and Curtana, and special thanks to Elyn Ross for all of her patience and help."
This story is set before and as Prince Charming sends Mowgli on the hunt to find Bigby.

 

Farscape

Legends: Fallen Star
Summary: Who lost when Aeryn gained?
Pairing: J/A
Category: Do as you will
Rating: PG-13 for disturbing innuendo.
Spoilers: First season
Comment: For Koren and Rae. Because they believe.

Legends: Genesis
Summary: Men and aliens and even ships die. What is left?
Pairing: J/A
Category: I don't know, what do you think?
Rating: PG-13 for general unpleasantness
Spoilers: First season
Comment: For Sabine and Mark and all of my Future-Farfic predecessors. Thanks for the inspiration.

Legends: House Asunder
Summary: A dark day for the Regiment.
Pairing: J/A Category: I don't know, what do you think?
Rating: PG-13 for general unpleasantness
Spoilers: First episode
Comment: For the irrepressible, irreplaceable Ratgrl, my partner in crime and all kinds of fun.

Legends: Prince of Lies
Summary: A look from the other side of the chase.
Pairing: J/A Category: I don't know, what do you think?
Rating: PG-13 for general unpleasantness
Spoilers: First season
Comment: This one's for you, JT.

Beautiful Stranger
Summary: An uplifting and gloriously dark moment courtesy of the episode "Bug's Life".
Pairing: J/A of course!
Category: Romance, Song fic
Rating: PG-13 for mature ideas
Spoilers: "Bug's Life"

Hero Tale
Summary: If life is a fairy tale, what part do you play?
Pairing: J/A
Category: Vignette, Romance, Gillina angst
Rating: PG-13 for mature ideas
Spoilers: "Hidden Memory"
Comment: Look! I can write Gillina fic too! Sort of...

 

Firefly

The Founders of the Feast (PG-13 rated version)
Summary: In the early days, before the series, the first members of Serenity's crew find something worth being thankful for.
Rating: PG-13 (Mature ideas). Totally gen fic. Suitable for all audiences that don't mind depiction of recreational substances.
Disclaimer: All hail the mighty Joss. Sue me not, for I do this out of love for thy characters.
Author's Note: Yes, there are nine people on Serenity during the series, but there weren't always. For the R-rated version of this story, go here. If you would like to find about more about the series, go to Firefly Fans.

The Founders of the Feast (R-rated version)
Summary: In the early days, before the series, the first members of Serenity's crew find something worth being thankful for.
Warning: M/Z/W fic
Rating: R (Non-graphic sexual content)
Summary: In the early days, before the series, the first members of Serenity's crew find something worth being thankful for. If you would like to find about more about the series, go to Firefly Fans.
Disclaimer: All hail the mighty Joss. Sue me not, for I do this out of love for thy characters.
Author's Note: Yes, there are nine people on Serenity during the series, but there weren't always.

The Founders of the Feast, DVD-cut with director's commentary!
Well, okay, author's commentary. Other factors same as above.

Modest Proposal
Notes: Set in the early days of Serenity. Pragmatism rules. Innuendo. Mildly evil fic.
Pairing: Wash/Zoe/Mal (Sort of)
Rating: PG-13 (Mature ideas)
Summary: Pragmatism rules.
Disclaimer: All hail the mighty Joss. Sue me not, I do this out of love for thy characters.

 

From Eroica With Love

Diminished Capacity
Rating: PG-13
Summary: The Major needs some rest.

Impossible! Seven Lurid Tales of Unusual Passion
Illustrated by O-ji! O-ji's excellent fan art can be seen at Honey Source Kingdom.
Rating: PG-13
Summary: "When attempting a work in the fan fiction tradition of “Five things that never happened” AU anthologies, I found that From Eroica With Love was such fertile ground that I couldn’t possibly stop with just five. Prepare to be horrified, surprised and hopefully amused."

Impossible! with Author's & Beta-reader's commentary
The "Impossible" snippets with commentary by the author and by Kadorienne, the beta-reader.

Irresistible Forces
Authors: Kadorienne & Grey Bard
Rating: PG-13
Summary: The Major sniffs out a conspiracy in his own household. Part of the Entanglements series.

Eroica scrimshaw knife
Grey Bard is a craftsman as well as a ficcer. Offsite link.

 

Hellblazer

Merry Christmas Hellblazer, it's a Wonderful Life for Christmas Caroling
Summary: John Constantine handles some unusual holiday visitors.
Rating: PG-13

 

Hustle

Regards, Oluwa Matumbo
Written for: Andraste in the Yuletide 2005 Challenge
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Danny/Mickey

 

Leverage

Like It Says On The Box
Written with Kadorienne
Rating: PG-13
Bound crossover
Inspired by two lines of dialogue in "The Stork Job", which appear at the end of the fic.

 

Lord of the Rings

To Sail Against The Tide
Four things the official histories of Middle Earth left out.
Rating: PG

 

Nero Wolfe

Five Lives Nero Wolfe Never Led
Rating: PG
Summary: Nero Wolfe is Nero Wolfe is Nero Wolfe is Nero Wolfe is Nero Wolfe.
Author's note: All I can say is it's all Kadorienne's fault. Entirely. I blame her. Don't you?

 

NCIS

Genius At Work
Rating: G
Summary: Of course Abby would write fanfiction about Ichabod Crane. Tim Burton meets forensic science for the win! (Written for fiandyfic's write a character's fanfiction challenge meme.)
Author's Note: I blame Kadorienne for this, entirely. Just so you know. See, this is what I get for dragging her into fandoms!

 

Ocean's 11

The Road to Reno
Written for: Dira Sudis, via the Obscure Fandoms Secret Santa Project
Danny Ocean is not repentant, not reformed, not a bookie and not in the state of New Jersey. But that doesn't mean he wants his wife to know that.
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Danny/Rusty

 

Outsiders

Same As It Ever Was
Summary:  If you squint, it could almost be the old bunker. Arsenal is here, they're taking down low-rent losers to kill time, and everyone came home laughing. Well, everyone but Nightwing. Same thing.
Author: Grey Bard
Rating: PG-13
Notes: Written for the  Jingle Bells, Batman Smells 2007 fic exchange
Warning: Canonical f/f couple, character with canonical slasher tendencies.

 

Runaways

A Hard Day's Work
Fandom: Runaways (comic)
Written for: Kouryou in the Yuletide 2006 Challenge
Summary: This isn't how I thought I'd be spending my weekends, okay? A cyborg's work is never done.

 

Sandbaggers

The Fairy King
Okay, so they gave an inappropriate Elf-fic challenge and I got there late. Sue me. I found out about this third hand, so of course it's late.
But still, it had to be done. The Sandbaggers do Faerie.
'Cause you know. Big tough secret agents. They like that kind of thing.

 

The Sentinel

Father In-law: An Everyday Life I
Summary: In which a man comes to terms with the truth, if not the actual reality.
Rating: PG, for humor and general non-Disneyness
Spoilers: Mega-spoilers for "Remembrance"
Email me (Please, please, please; bounce, bounce, bounce) to send praise, honest criticisms, recipe requests, or photos of Blair in a kilt.

Night Mission: An Everyday Life II: Double-Oh-Ellison
Rating: PG for Fantasy Violence
Series: Part 2 of "An Everyday Life"
Intro: This comes after "Father in Law" in the Everyday Life series. Forgive me if it's an odd little piece, bit it was written in the dentist's waiting room. If I had James Bond technology at the dentist's... talk about wish-fulfilment!

Domestic Relations: An Everyday Life III
Rating: G
Series: Part 3 of "An Everyday Life"

The Doctor is In: An Everyday Life IV
Summary: Blair decides to take action.
Rating: PG-13
Series: Part 4 of "An Everyday Life"

A Day Out: An Everyday Life V
Summary: An unconventional holiday
Rating: PG
Heh heh heh.... This is what happens when I go on vacation. I get ideas! (A word to the wise; run away while you still can.) All places and inanimate objects, actually exist in lovely, freaky, Los Angeles with the exception of "El Playtime Boutike". My hometown in Pennsylvania owns that dubious honor, I'm afraid.
A thousand thanks to Dawn Powell and Quiltaday my lovely Beta-readers, as well as my dear archiver and patroness Shycat. And of course, undying loyalty to a certain bunch of elves who started it all....
P.S. Got a gripe, question, suggestion, picture of Blair in a kilt (not necessarily real)? Feedback of any kind enthusiastically accepted here.

Sore Loser: An Everyday Life VI
Summary: Yeah, okay, summary; Part six of An Ordinary Life. Not your average hurt/comfort story.
Rating: PG for Bodily Fluids
Series: Part 6 of "An Everyday Life"
Email: Email me ( Please, please, please...bounce, bounce, bounce) here with questions, praise, criticism, and yup I still want to find a picture of Blair in a kilt.
Intro: Oooh......... You can get a sugar high from cough drops! My throat went out on me two weeks ago and all my "sympathetic" friends and wonderful colleagues did not make it any easier. I figured, heck, why should I suffer alone? A little revenge fantasy is good for the soul.

 

Sleepy Hollow

Genius At Work
Rating: G
Summary: Of course Abby would write fanfiction about Ichabod Crane. Tim Burton meets forensic science for the win! (Written for fiandyfic's write a character's fanfiction challenge meme.)
Author's Note: I blame Kadorienne for this, entirely. Just so you know. See, this is what I get for dragging her into fandoms!

 

Stargate Atlantis

The Only Help You'll Get (You're Gonna Get Right Here)
Written for: Suaine
PG-13, femslash
Pairing: Teyla/Suaine
Fandoms: SGA, Dead Zone, and cameos.

Unto the Breach
Recipient: Medley
Rating: PG-13
Fandoms: Stargate: Atlantis & Babylon 5
Summary: Agent Bester is from the NID, and he's here to help you. Of course he is.

The Better Part of Valor
Author: Grey Bard
Pairings: Ronon Dex/Teyla Emmagen, Ronon Dex/Elizabeth Weir
Rating: PG-13
Summary: It's weirder, sleeping with two women.
Notes: Written for the "Blame Someone Else" challenge at summercon - personally, I blame eleveninches for her request of "Elizabeth/Ronon/Teyla love triangle." My thanks to Othercat for being online at just the right moment to help with some quick and dirty brainstorming.

 

Star Wars

Daughter O' The Sith: A Romantic Comedy
Rating: PG-13 for implied genocide, sedition, and other fun stuff
Summary: You know what kind of PR disaster something like this would be if it got out to the paparazzi?
A Star Wars AU
Pairing: Han/Leia

 

The Tudors

The Very Secret Diaries of Anne Boleyn (Which Are Very Historical And Not Made Up At All)
Written with Kadorienne
Fandom: The Tudors
Grey Bard's notes: "Inspired by Kadorienne's LolTudor graphic which illustrates this fic."
Kadorienne's notes: "This was inspired when I saw a copy of The Secret Diary of Anne Boleyn by Robin Maxwell in a bookstore. I immediately remembered Cassie Claire's brilliant and seminal Very Secret Diary of Aragorn and the associations were inevitable. Thank you to bunnster and lafemmedarla for helping me find the right scene to cap for this."

 

The Vorkosigan Books

A Diversion
Written for the Yuletide 2004 challenge.
Admiral Naismith and Captain Bel Thorne have some time on their hands, a mission, and more sense than their employers.
Rating: PG-13.

 

X-Files

Fifty Ways for Krychek to Recover
Summary: A little filk to a Paul Simon tune about, well, you read the title.
Rating: PG

 

X-Men

Inspection #371: Getting a Life I
Summary: Fluff. Gentle Iceman-centric fluff.
Rating: PG (Yes kiddies, a Grey Bard fic you too can read.)
Comments/Explanations: Because I, personally, think Bobby would like this. So there.

Little Changes: Getting a Life II
Summary: Controversy in the X-mansion
Rating: PG (Yes kiddies, a Grey Bard fic you too can read.)
Comments/Explanations: An apology to lovers of Rogue and Jean. I like them too, but comic relief has to come from somewhere.
Dedication: To Crystal M. for the wonderful winning name. Also, a big thanks to everyone who gave me suggestions. You just might see them used here.

 

Original Works

The Curse of Bast
Summary: Want to see an eight year old's idea of wacky fun? The Curse of Bast was my would-be bestseller, all the way back in third grade. Cats! Curses! Pie fights! I made sure this baby had it all.

I Was An Unpaid Comic Book Intern!
Summary: GB's comic book about her experiences. Email Grey Bard for the link.

Spurious Speculation On the V. Secret Diary of an Assistant Comic Book Editor
Summary: Wherein the Damn Intern makes Libelous Attempts at chronicling a week in the life of her boss.

An Issue by Issue Guide to The Avengers for The Iron Man / Captain America and Ficcing Fan

An Issue by Issue Guide to Captain America Comics for the Ficcing Fan

 

 

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