Disclaimer: “From Eroica With Love” belongs to Yasuko Aoike, and
Fabulousman belongs to Kadorienne, but she let me borrow him for a while.
Notes: I had the idea for this fic—well, the punchline, anyway—before
this series started and after a conversation with Kadorienne about the
idea of a possible Eroica/Batman crossover. Takes place some time after “Second
Summary: The Major must go to Gotham City. Dorian tags along.
By: Margaret Price
Written: November 28, 2007
* * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * * *
“Why did we come here again?” Dorian asked as he looked out the car window at
the dark, sleek structures stretching upward into the sky above of Gotham City.
The city certainly lived up to its name. It was quite gothic. Even in
the daylight, it was very…dark.
The Major heaved an exasperated sigh, throwing a quick sideways glance in the
Earl’s direction. “I am here for a conference,” he replied
coldly. “You are here to annoy me.”
A bright smile illuminated the Earl’s face. “Oh yes! That was it.”
Klaus was too busy concentrating on the heavy traffic at this point to throw an
angry scowl in the other man’s direction.
After he had whipped the ineffectual fools making up Europe’s meteor enhanced
Hall of Heroes—or whatever the hell they were calling themselves these
days—into some sort of organized fighting force, he had been invited to the
U.S. to assist the M.E.’s there to do the same. Or at least, to advise those trying
to train them.
Klaus had not been surprised to see the Earl patiently waiting for him at the
airport with a smug expression on his face, the bloody showoff. After this was
a quick stop for a briefing, to pick up his paperwork, and to find out who his
liaison was. Bloody Batman.
“Is it true that Batman’s filing a lawsuit against you?” Dorian asked suddenly,
breaking into the Major’s train of thought. “Trademark infringement or some
Klaus was grateful for the red light, which gave him the opportunity to glare
at the Earl. “I am not going to discuss that ridiculous name that those fucking
idiots pinned on me!”
Dorian leaned back in his seat, twirling a curl around a finger. “I think it’s
“Iron Klaus is not cute!”
The Earl flashed a bright smile. “I disagree.” He leaned over to plant a
lightning-fast kiss on the man’s cheek just as the light changed. “Green for
go, my Fledermaus.”
A low growl rose in the Major’s throat. “Don’t call me that!” he snapped. “You
“Well, that’s different.”
“How?” came the pointed reply.
“Well…” Dorian fumbled a moment. He hadn’t really thought about it. Neither of
them had actually chosen the names that now seemed to follow them. They had
been chosen for them…somehow.
It was to this that the Earl finally conceded. He looked back out the window at
the chrome and glass structure that seemed to be their final destination. The
parking garage was even more gothic than the exterior. “I don’t see what’s
wrong with Eroica,” he said breezily. “It’s a perfectly good name.”
“Eroica, Prince of Thieves?” Klaus countered, pulling into a parking space and
finally killing the engine. He turned to look directly at the Earl.
“You know full well that Eroica means hero,” Dorian said, crossing his arms.
“And Fabulousman sounds like…like… Oh, I don’t know. A flying fashion show.”
“You are a flying fashion show!” Klaus said as he reached back to
retrieve his briefcase from the back seat. “Never wearing the same thing
“I still have my standards, Major!” Dorian saw a dark look pass over Klaus’s
face when he looked at his watch. “When’s your meeting?”
“Not for another two hours.”
Dorian’s eyes flickered. “I know how we can pass the time…” he purred
seductively, running a finger up the officer’s arm.
Klaus gave him a sideways glance and allowed a small smile to play at the edges
of this mouth. “I don’t have any roses.”
“Oh!” Dorian motioned as though to slap his arm, but stopped short of actual
physical contact. He was determined to never harm his beloved Major again.
Klaus opened the briefcase and pulled out a folder. “You might as well see who
your competition is,” he said, handing them over a stack of photographs.
Dorian’s bright blue eyes widened as he paged through the photos. “These are
“No. Batman’s standard unenhanced villains, apparently.”
“You are joking?”
Klaus tapped a finger on the photo of The Joker. “No, that’s his jurisdiction.”
"Good God! He's all teeth!"
The Earl flipped from one photo to the next as the Major briefed him about
them. Each villain seemed more outrageous than the next. And the names!
Scarecrow, Catwoman, Riddler, Poison Ivy, Mr. Freeze, Mad Hatter, The Penguin,
Two-Face, Bookworm… The costumes. The hair. The…makeup?!
After going through them all, Dorian handed the photos back to the Major and
announced that he was flying back to England. This naturally took Klaus
completely off guard. “Just like that? Why?”
“Oh, my dearest Klaus…” Dorian leaned over, giving him a tender kiss on the
mouth. “As over-the-top as I am, clearly, no one can out camp Batman.”